Author: Grumpissimo

One day, Grumpisimo was very tired and decided to take a nap. He laid down by the window sill in the fireplace room and shut his eyes. Very quickly he fell asleep.

In his dreams, he saw a HUGE kielbasa more than 4 feet tall! At first, it seemed like it was going to take very shortly to eat the 4-foot tall kielbasa, but Grumpisimo turned out wrong. The kielbasa all of a sudden it started growing… and growing… and GROWING… until it was 12 feet tall!

In his dream, Grumpisimo started running towards the couch and jumped on it. Under the pillows in a secret fort, Paczek and Grumpush were playing cards and Paczek was winning. “Hi there Grumpisimo, how are you doing?” asked Grumpush. ” HELP ME, THERE’S A BIG 12 FOOT TALL KIELBASA CHASING ME! HELP DEFEAT IT BY EATING IT! PLEASE JUST FINISH YOUR CARD GAME LATER!” Screamed Grumpisimo hoping they would say yes. “That’s weird, but yes, we LOVE kielbasa!” said Paczek and Grumpush. The two cats put their cards down and followed Grumpisimo into the fireplace room.

The kielbasa was gone! “Where is the kielbasa?!” said Paczek. ” I don’t know!” said Grumpisimo. “Maybe it went into another room, or maybe you were dreaming,” said Grumpush. “I WAS NOT!” Yelled Grumpisimo. “ok, ok”whispered Grumpush.

So they went into the kitchen and they saw the kielbasa standing by the trash. “Shh.. let’s sneak up on it the attack with our claws and teeth,” whispered Paczek. “Ok” whispered the other two kitties.

They started walking very slowly towards the kielbasa. They were right next to the kielbasa and ATTACKED!!!!!!!!! They were biting and clawing and chewing at the kielbasa. An hour later the kielbasa was gone. (In all of the kitties bellies) “Grumpisimo!! Grumpisimo!” Grumpisimo woke up and shook himself. “Wait, what! This was all a dream!” thought Grumpisimo.

Christmas Trees going out of style for Cats

Christmas Trees are going out of style for cats all over Cat world. This is because Meowlon Meowt said that Cat Cola is made from the sap of the Christmas tree. Christmas trees are grown in Canada, Norway, and Iceland those are the only places they are grown. The Cat Cola company is selling over 10,000 cans every week in the United States. Cats are now using Japanese Cherry Blossom trees instead of Christmas trees. Cherry Blossom Trees are grown almost everywhere in Cat world. But the most popular places are:

• Japan
• China
• Hawaii
• Canada

A Catz Times reporter Ocelot Logica went out into the streets of  Mew York city and asked the cats there “What do you think about this issue?’. About 51% of the cats said they don’t care. 49% said they do care. Ocelot Logica interviewed one of the cats that said they do not care. This is what he said. Ocelot Logica: “Well how do you feel about this issue?” Lupin Meowsetter; I honestly don’t care about whether we have Christmas trees or not, it’s all about the presents”. Ocelot Logica: “Thankyou for letting us interview you, Meowy Catmas!” Lupin Meowstter: “Meowy Catmas to you to!”

Meowy Catmas

Stores across New Jersey are closing as Christmas gets closer and closer. Cats already know this, but they are still crowding around stores hoping they will open up again. Stores will not be opening until after Christmas.

Cats on the Subway ?!

Cat reporter Ocelot Logica goes on the Subway in Mew York city to ask cats: “Do we need subway systems?” When Ocelot went to the subway station, 92% said that they definitely need subway stations. Ocelot interviewed one of the cats that said yes. Here is the full interview. Ocelot Logica: “Do you think we need subway systems?”
Fuzzy Meowcaster: “Yes, because if we did not, Mew York city would be more crowded with cat cars than it has ever been.” Ocelot Logica:” Yeah, I agree with you Fuzzy”. Ocelot Logica:” Well thank you for letting me interview you, have a Meowy Catmas!”Fuzzy Meowcaster: “ You to Ocelot!

Catnip Joes

Catnip Joe ® is a place that is kind of like Whole Foods Markets except for cats, there is also a Cat Café there for cats to eat and rest.

This village is located in the east part of Cat Himalayas.

When you first arrive you should see two guard cats standing by the entrance, when you see that means you arrived. Show your ID then they will let you through.

When you enter, you enter a narrow dark hallway you will see two doors, one will say Friskies City with a gold plate above the door but go thru the one that says Meow Zhou Village. When you enter you should see two cherry blossoms trees in front of you. Go over the brown bridge and turn left, then you should see a room that says ”Circus Mrowch” take your ID slide it there and take the key that it gives you so then take it and get out of the Meow Zhou village.

Mission complete. Retreat to Joyce’s house after that mission.